|
|
|
|
His name already legendary, golfer Tiger Woods wants to be traded because he wants to be the first PGA player to do so. "After winning four majors in a row, which is a rare accomplishment in What Woods is talking about is his demanding to be traded. Although he has not made public where he wants to be traded to, some believe he could be headed to The Secret Sausage Government. They are the organization responsible for replacing the US flag with a round sausage patty. "Wherever I end up, I demand to be compensated in Canadian money," said Woods, who insists this is not a retirement. "I'll be able to sleep better at night —inside my vibrating waffle iron — knowing that my salary is worth half as much in the United States. Isn't that how most people would want it to be?" Woods claims that he would like to be traded before the 2001 US Open Championship (June 11). "That's when I'd like it to happen," he said. "I'm tired of beating up on Phil Mickelson. He's got such a lovely wife and daughter. It must be really tough for them to drive home after losing to me again and again and again. And I'm sure they're saying 'That damn Tiger.'" Woods did make it clear that his decision to be traded could be the result of lack of playing time. "I like it here," he said. "I want to be here. But I don't want to be anywhere I'm not going to play. If they feel they need someone else to do the job, fine. That is their decision. "I'd like to tell you it doesn't bother me, but it does," he said. "If I'm not going to have playing time, I'm not happy."
| |
|
|
|
this sport, I really want to do something that no golfer has ever done before," explained Woods. "And I'm not talking about sinking a tournament winning put using my big toe."